47 summers and the same winters, to realise that my life’s out of kilter. Too much stress too self critically, too egotistical to realise its pity full. Maybe too delicate to see that every time I build these walls that surround me. It’s hard enough for me to see over the edge, let alone other people to hear what I said. I’m hearing echo in the empty ally’s, started to lose sight of reality, finger nails worn down tryna scale the wall that I build, so once again I can see my wife chilled. I’m sorry for the pain sorry for the anger, sorry for the time you’ve spent with a stranger. I’m sorry for the pain sorry for the anger, sorry for the time you’ve spent with a stranger.

It took me 47 winters to chill I can’t lie I spent a couple winters billing up and taking pills. Trying to dumb down the pain, but like eternity’s picture forever in the frame. Hanging in the hallways begging to be seen, hanging in the hallways the final seen. Images of self-pity a lonely opponent now I pity those images every single moment, Was in a place where vulture don’t even roost. Darker then the bottom of double barrels to shoot. But saw a smile on the beach, turned round and saw the footsteps were four deep. But before try and give myself away, I got to learn how to love myself someday. I’m sorry for the pain sorry for the anger sorry for the time I spent with a stranger.

Sometimes crippled by exhaustion on the outside its fine but on the inside I’m crawling. Tryna escape these walls, the ones that are closing in before they fall. From the dust the bricks the mortar. I look around and I catch a glimpse of my daughter. Heaven forbid I ever chose to leave, but I understand how a close call can feel. I keep a picture in my mind, but you will never understand how it saves me at times. I couldn’t do what was done to me; a lifetime of questioning myself and not the family. I see these questions echo every day, but I will never leave you this was. I’m sorry for the pain sorry for anger, I’m sorry if you ever saw me as a stranger.